Changing Habits

Changing a habit can be insidious. After months of cultivation, you barely think about your previous behavior, and then, BAM! it reappears at a strange and unexpected time.

This is your test.

Do you give in to the previous pattern or do you stand up for yourself, swat away the old, and resume your new, better actions?

Sometimes you persevere, and other times you slip. The key to moving forward, though, is to reinforce your resolve. Refresh your memory by recalling your “why”: Why did you change this habit? Do those reasons still make sense? Do you feel compelled to continue with your strategy for change?

Little Actions Make a Big Difference

Last week I enjoyed dinner at The Smith at Lincoln Center. It wasn’t a special occasion or a holiday. It was simply two friends having dinner before attending a performance at across the street.

And then we met Nick.

I had been observing him as he stopped at each table, engaging the guests. He didn’t ask the perfunctory “How was your dinner?” while halfway to the next table. Instead, he seemed genuinely interested and personally invested in the guest experience.

The Year of the Rooster

Saturday marks the lunar New Year, or Chinese New Year, which will be celebrated for seven days around the world. The coming year is the year of the rooster. “Roosters” are hard-working, courageous, and talented, among other traits. Other roosters were born in 1921, 1933, 1945, 1957, 1969, 1981, 1993, and 2005.

Although this may not be a holiday that you celebrate personally, chances are you have colleagues, co-workers, clients, or friends who celebrate it.

Many large cities hold New Year’s celebrations, which represent great opportunities to attend and participate. Acknowledging the holiday can be a way to not only expand your relationships, but to learn about traditions that may not be familiar to you.

Relationship Connections

How do you develop your relationships? Do you have a conscious plan to see them, interact with them, or reach out on their behalf? How frequently are you in touch?

The answers to these questions today are different than even five years ago. I surveyed a few people recently, and two people’s responses were representative of the others. One person said, “Of course – I just texted her” and another offered, “I’m sure they saw my Facebook page, so they know what I’m up to.”

You know where I’m going with this. Although texting or posting on Facebook are in much wider usage today, it is shortsighted to think that these are the best ways to stay in touch.

Help Is on the Way

People get so caught up in their day to day routines that sometimes they don’t notice if a co-worker is struggling. It could be someone who has suffered a loss or is recovering from an illness or is care taking an elderly parent.

The reason doesn’t matter. What matters is what we do about it. This is especially important if it’s an intense job environment and the people experiencing these challenges are normally self-starters who get everything done well and on time. You think that they can handle the additional pressure, but they’re human, too.

Leaders need to step forward and make sure that people in these circumstances are supported so that their potentially fragile state doesn’t trigger a downward spiral.

Be It Resolved

Happy New Year! I hope you enjoyed the holidays and are back in the swing of things rarin’ to go (or, at least back in the swing of things….).

Most people make some sort of New Year’s resolutions. And many of those resolutions have drifted down the priority list already. I believe that the difference in outcome is based on how you go about implementing your “resolution strategy”.

Huh? A strategy? Who knew!

Embracing the New Year

We have only a few days left in 2016. As you reflect on the year, how would you rate it? Was it among your top five years, bottom five years, or somewhere in between (or don’t you even want to think about it)?

It’s not time to lament what could have, should have, or would have been. Rather, put your energy into what you’d like to achieve next year. It’s time to focus on what’s next rather than what hasn’t been.

Think about what worked well that you’d like to continue doing. Do more of those things and make sure that you make the time to do them. When we get busy or overwhelmed, our positive activities have a strange habit of sneaking lower on the priority list. Don’t let this happen!

To Be in Harmony

Last Sunday CBS Sunday Morning featured a segment on the Harmony Project, a non-profit organization in Columbus, Ohio whose mission is to connect people across social divides through the arts, education, and volunteer community service. Its goal is to create a community in harmony.

The 225-member community choir uses music as a tool to strengthen the voices of individuals while creating a collective voice for the greater community.

This story resonated with me in sharp contrast to the divisive environment that has dominated the news and crept into our lives personally. We need reminders of our humanity, and this story accomplishes this.

Tips for the Overwhelmed

This December has seemed more hectic than any in my recent memory. And I know it’s not just me. People are frantically trying to wrap up the year at a whirlwind pace. I see this with my clients, my colleagues, and my friends.

I’m going to share some “tips for the overwhelmed” that can help you stay sane during this second half of December.

Stop obsessing about what you haven’t done or have to do. That’s a waste of time. Instead, it’s much better to take action. Review your list of priorities (priorities, not every task that you didn’t complete this year) and rank them in importance.

Do Your Employees Hate Coming to Work?

Last Sunday, The New York Times republished a 2014 article, “Why You Hate Work”. Among other things, the article summarizes the results of a survey conducted by one of the authors, and reinforced challenges of employee engagement in the workplace.

They cited four things that make a difference in employee engagement and productivity.

1. Renewal – the ability to take breaks to refresh. A notable quote: “feeling encouraged by one’s supervisor to take breaks increases by nearly 100 percent people’s likelihood to stay with any given company, and also doubles their sense of health and well-being.”

2. Value – feeling appreciated by one’s supervisor